My Brain

I’ve always hated how my brain works
How it processes information, always seems to want to goto panic mode
Always looking for the worse
Needing something to stress over

I wish I could stop it
I’m tired of it
Can’t stand the stress from my brain
I keep thinking maybe things will change tomorrow

That’s not the case, it’s almost like tomorrow makes it worse
At times I wish my brain would just stop
But I know what that would mean and others wouldn’t like it
Or so I’m guessing, maybe they would, I don’t know

At times I wonder if there’s something wrong with me.
I feel like I can’t sit down and do some thinking without going into panic
Start thinking about the future and how screwed I am
Start wondering how can I possibly change it, realize it’s not possible.

It’s almost like my life is a train stuck on it’s tracks and I see the future
Can’t really do anything about it except sit and wait
Wondering when will it get to me, wondering how bad it’s going to be
Who am I kidding, I know it will be bad.

I’m going to be lost, confused and completely fucked
Always felt like I have no place to go, I get the feeling it’ll be true.
It makes me not want to get out of bed at times
Hopefully laying in bed will help me out

But I already know that it won’t
I feel like I don’t even know who I am
People keep telling me to do certain things with my life.
My life hasn’t worked out in that way yet.

I feel like life isn’t for me
Not sure what would be for me.
Maybe something
Maybe nothing

Kennie

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