Do You Really Love Me ?

Do you really love me ?
How do I know ?
How do I know your heart is true to me ?

If I chose to take my own life today
Would we meet up in purgatory tomorrow ?
While the blood spilled from my veins today what would you be planning

Would you be planning a way for a time spent eternally with me ?
Or would you spend your time grieving and in time moving on
Finding the next guy who fills your soul with those things that I couldn’t

How do I know we were meant to be ?
How do I know that you would want to be together with me forever
What if I ended up in hell ?

Would you want to spend your life in hell with me
Where all the bad things possible could be done to us
But we would be together, isn’t that the main thing for eternal love

Isn’t that what everyone wants is to spend love together.
What if death do it’s part isn’t enough ?
What if I wanted to be with you after death

What if I was willing to trade my wings and halo to go to hell
What if I was willing to battle a thousand demons to goto heaven
What if I was willing to do all that, would you it be worth my time

Would you actually be happy to see me ?
Would you look at me and smile and know that I went through hell
That I went through the fucking impossible in order to see you

Would that be enough for you ?
Or would you look at me like “what do you want ?”
Expecting me to do that every month, week, day

Am I just wasting my time in order to fulfill this thing called happiness
Like we were some video game characters and you were the one that filled
That filled my love and actually put a smile on my face, would it be worth my time

Or am I wasting my time
Am I best to let you set sail to find someone else
In order to go with him, the one who seems to hunt you and pursue you

Is he the one that you would rather wake up next to
The one that you don’t have to worry about, the one you can see anytime
Who would drop the world to come see you.

Not the one that you deeply worry about when you don’t talk to
What might he be doing ?
Will this be the last message, his last breath, is this his death

What if deep down you secretly feel like I’m not worth your time
But your afraid to tell me, because your afraid.
Afraid about how I may take it, not knowing if I’m strong enough

Would you be willing to show me that I’m worth it
Or am I starring at the drain
The drain in the bathroom, while I watch drips of blood

Run down my wrist, dripping from my fingers
Into the sink to collectively fill the sink before my body can take no more
Dropping itself to the ground in order to lay in that position to be found.

By someone, only for news of my demise to filter through the world
To sometime come to you
How would you react, would you want to meet up in purgatory

Or would I never see you again and I would walk alone until the end of the end



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